Hey there fellow Apprentices,
I’m excited to take you for a spin of a whole new type of content to add to the Mastery In Your 20s roster. Named Discussions - they will be a place to share a unique take on the mental models required to build a portfolio career.
This first piece has been co-authored with Avivah Wittenberg-Cox, who I met on Substack’s 6-week Grow programme last month. Her enthusiasm for career and life captivated me instantly and I knew we had to speak.
Only after talking did I come to learn that her credentials only proved to reinforce the first impression I had, with a wealth of experience writing several best-selling books, delivering 3 Ted Talks and consulting CEOs on gender and generational balance.
All while writing one of my now favourite newsletters called Elderberries about her deep well of experiences and lessons learnt in the fields of gender, ageing, longevity - and their overlaps. Check it out here.
In short, she’s a huge inspiration.
So, I’m excited to share with you today’s discussion on how different (or similar) our priorities are in the 2nd Quarter (25-50) and 3rd Quarter (50-75) of our lives. It’s amazing what we found.
Let’s get into it.
Introduction
Whether you are 25 or 55, you are likely to be asking yourself some big questions about how, where and with whom to create your next life chapter. While this may be expected in your 20s, it’s more surprising in your 50s and 60s. Everyone knows that the 20s are about moving into adulthood and discovering who you are. Few recognise that you’re doing exactly the same thing a quarter of a century later.
In our longer, trending-towards-100 year lives, there are four distinct quarters, each with their own priorities, generational contexts and developmental tasks. The 20s is the start of the 2nd Quarter (25-50), the 50s the start of the 3rd Quarter (50-75). Longevity has gifted us an increasingly healthy and vibrant 3rd Quarter, which is why it’s time to learn from our juniors how to begin. Remember?
We are two writers, coaches and consultants writing on Substack about our respective Quarters, Charlie on Q2 and Avivah on Q3. So we thought we’d get together to compare notes. What surprised us both was just how parallel our thinking was, and how in our 50s and 60s we seem to cycle round through the same questions we wrestled with in our 20s, but with more. More knowledge, experience, networks, maybe money. But the same questions. Again!
Top 5 Priorities of People in their 20s
Entering your 20s is a period of embracing change and discovering the person you want to become. You’re expected to be an ‘adult’ for the first time, taking on the responsibilities of living on your own, while excelling in your career and saying yes to every social opportunity in front of you. Your life balances on the thread of a needle with too much to do and too little time and money to do it all.
As compromises have to be made, those of us in our 20s start to learn how to say “no” to activities that don’t align with our interests. At first the juggling of priorities becomes a circus act in which we spin multiple plates without letting any leave our fingertips. But, after a life change or two, the plates begin to spin faster and faster right up until we realise we can’t keep hold of them all at once. Then all we can do is take a step back, get clear on our priorities and focus on what actually matters. This takes a lot of trial and error, but for those of their in our 2nd Quarter, this generally looks like:
Learning - They want to be challenged and pushed outside of their comfort zone. Craving experience from others who have “been there”, they’ll soak up their advice like a sponge. But, once they feel stuck, they’re unafraid to quit their jobs and move on in search of the next learning opportunity.
Connection - They want to feel connected to other people that truly understand them. Breaking down stereotypes of inexperience, they want to feel heard by friends and business contacts alike, regardless of their age.
Network - They want to build a network of people they can rely on to find them jobs and support their learning and development. Connecting with both fellow young people and older mentors, they want to meet a diverse range of people.
Impact - They want to make a difference in the world. They are driven by a purpose and need to believe in the mission of themselves and others. Keen to have their voices heard, they will happily boycott brands or shout about causes they care about to make sure the world becomes a better place.
Creating - They want to join the creator economy and build their own audience on a platform they enjoy. They’re digitally native and competent at using social media to stay in touch with friends, but they’re unsure how to create content that positions them as an authority online.
Are there any priorities you’d add or change?
Top Priorities of People in their 50s/60s
Entering your 50s is a period of embracing change and discovering the person you want to become - next. You’re expected to be a mature, experienced ‘adult’, but you may feel bored, restless and in need of a rethink, if not a reset. Your life is a complex mash-up of multiple roles, demands and priorities, although there may be generational shifts and change afoot with parents ageing and kids moving on.
In addition, massive external change, and a post-pandemic world, are banging right into one of the biggest demographic shifts we’ve ever known as a species. And one of the biggest generations, the Boomers, is entering its 3rd Quarter, blindly unprepared for what awaits. The hardy, the wealthy and the entrepreneurial are finding purpose and pleasure in late reinventions. The other end of the spectrum – the unprepared, the poor, the anxious - are being tossed on the ageist scrap heap, and then voting with their wounds, electing populists who promise pride, flags and scapegoats to address the emotional overflow.
What are the priorities of those who want to ‘lean in’ to the opportunities that beckon at this stage?
Learning - They want to be recognised for their knowledge and experience and also be allowed to develop and grow into new areas. Not be shelved as being too old to learn or automatically tech illiterate.
Connection - They want to feel inter-generationally connected and want to give back and support future generations. Feeling heard and seen becomes a new issue as many older people begin to struggle with ‘invisibility’ and ageism.
Network - They want to build a network of people with whom they can rejuvenate, re-create and play with. Maybe even make new friends as some of the older ones may no longer be fit for purpose - or very friendly.
Impact - They want to make a difference in the world - and if they’ve lived well, arrive at the top of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. Purpose and legacy become major drivers as many of their other, earlier goals have been met.
Creating/Giving - They want to join the creator economy (biggest growth of entrepreneurs is over 50) and build their own audience on a platform they enjoy. But they’re unsure where to start, how to navigate the explosion of tools at their disposal and how to survive in stripped-down mode, without the structure, status and teams that supported them until now.
What’s your experience of talking to those in their 3rd Quarter?
Conclusion
Those in their 2nd or 3rd quarter of life have remarkably similar priorities. They both want to be pushed to learn new skills and feel connected to other people. To network with like-minded people and leave a lasting impact.
Maybe it’s time they started to meet and make music together? Our worlds are designed to separate us generationally. It’s time to realise we have much more in common with each other than we think. We’re more likely to solve the big challenges ahead by harnessing our inter-generational powers. But we’ll need to design it in and push against the stereotypes.
We just did and enjoyed it.
Who might you want to collaborate with in a Quarter not your own?