Hey there fellow Apprentices,
We’re mixing things up for this diary.
Rather than trying to jam-pack everything that has happened in 4 weeks, I’m going to respect you, the reader, and get laser focused on the content for these entries by storytelling the most crucial details in these two sections:
What’s been going on.
What’s coming up next.
But, before we begin…
I wanted to say a HUGE thank you to the now 446 of you who decide to read each week and the 8 of you who support me on a paid basis. You are my accountability partners in this quest for self-mastery. Without YOU these words would have bounced around inside my head and never seen the light of day. However you decide to support, I appreciate you.
What’s Been Going On
In one word: Change.
Issy, my partner for the last 15 months, & I came to the decision to go our separate ways at the end of September. Not because of betrayal, argument or some explosive event, but simply because we’d fallen out of love with one another. For life had become a mostly familiar routine, blinding us to the reasons why we fell for one another to begin with. The conversations started slowly then suddenly as we discussed how we both felt and came to what we believed to be the only real solution: to embrace the desire for change.
So, I packed up my bags and left.
Travelling back to my quiet hometown of Shrewsbury in the West Midlands, I found myself in a one bedroom annex above my dad’s garage. A spacious flat with my own private space, the new location brought me mixed feelings. Part of me looked forward to the chance to embrace a slower pace of life without the endless commitments of the city. While the other part knew the aloneness that lay ahead, severing the support network & routine that I’d spent 12 months building and facing the inevitable withdrawal symptoms on my own. But, if you’ve been reading these entries for a little while you’ll know that I love nothing more than an opportunity to learn another dimension about myself. So, that’s what I set out to do.
But, before the suitcase had been emptied it was jam-packed again with clothes for a trip to Girona with my triathlon friends.
Dan, Briony, Megan, Jade & I flew out to Spain for 5 days of cycling, swimming and running our way around a town designed for endurance athletes like us. We made memories turning the gears on our gravel bikes by exploring the roads, mountains and everything in-between. Seconds bled into minutes and hours turned into days as we solidified our already existing friendship over chasing sunsets, falling in the mud and a few too many glasses of wine.
It was a beautiful trip. One where I actually switched off from everything for the first time since the Unplugged cabin in July.
Like all great times though, our training holiday quickly came to an end.
But, not without some last minute drama as we raced across Barcelona airport with our Maccies in one hand and passports in the other to make a last minute boarding of our flight to Gatwick. Bags checked in, through security and across what felt like the world’s largest terminal in record time. All while inhaling a chicken wrap and a special edition McFlurry before arriving at our gate pleasantly surprised with our achievements.
Whoever says you must be there 2 hours before departure is lying to you. You can do it in 75 minutes. But only if you’re a fast-food powered triathlete willing to break a land speed record or two to get there.
Before we knew it we were back in London.
We reminisced on a great trip, said our goodbyes and parted ways. After a brief sleepover at my sisters (there was no train home), I travelled back to the countryside and unpacked for the second time.
Those first few days at home were tough. The withdrawals from both the relationship and the friendships hit hard, my training routine was askew as I adjusted to a new location and I felt separated from my people. I reached out to a few old friends, made the effort to catch-up and tried to embrace the new experience for what it was. But, beneath the surface I could feel my motivation slowing and I knew I needed to do something about it.
So, I took decisive action.
I reached out for advice, worked with my new triathlon coach to decide on a standard training week and dived headfirst into the LinkedIn Creator Accelerator Programme (CAP) that I’d recently been accepted onto.
Deadlines were back in my diary, engaging work was filling my days, evenings and weekends and triathlon training was making up the rest. Within a week I’d found my coping mechanisms (sport, work & meditation) that would give me enough space to process the emotions without overwhelm and decided to lean into them.
Now, a week or so later, I’m still riding the emotional rollercoaster of change. Albeit with a newfound motivation to make the most of whatever is thrown at me by learning as much as I can about myself and this beautiful spectrum of existence we call life.
The lesson (if there is one): Embrace change for what it is. Allow yourself to feel the emotions inside of you. But, don’t wait to be saved. Take the action you know you need to be your best and help yourself get back to routine.
What’s Coming Up Next
Now that I’ve found a new rhythm to life, I have the time and headspace to pursue some long-term projects that have been on the backburner a little too long and I’m excited to share them with you.
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